I grew up in a more underserved part of Jacksonville, one of the parts that they tell you to be careful around. Due to my own upbringing, I am not new to risk. I am not unfamiliar with sleeping in streets and alleyways. I have dedicated my life to reducing the kind of harm that I experienced, which led me to pursuing music therapy, with my main focus being on the BIPOC and underserved communities. I studied vocal performance and classically trained in opera and many other genres at an HBCU.
About 4 months ago, I separated from my ex-husband, who I knew for about ten years, when he left me during a manic episode that was triggered by a criminally abusive “Dom” that I thought I knew. Tripping and falling into kink saved my head, and my heart.
I always had an interest in kink, years ago. But life never traveled down that path too heavily. I had a not so kind Dom, but I didn’t know what I was doing with him. But my divorce gave me a morbid freedom to explore deeper. I am also diagnosed with BPD, so it allowed me to take risks. I remembered a special interest of mine I had back in college that I never fully explored. “I figured out my hobby, but you’re not gonna like it.”
Kink was the perfect risky behavior. I was smarter now and knew what I wanted. I came back to Fet with a new mindset. It wasn’t a search for sex, but an interest in the release that people experience from kink. I wanted to unearth something new!
I discovered community, and through community I grew. I started really taking kink education seriously. I leaned into and now I’m encapsulated by it. I’ve seen for myself what the release can do, after having my first few experiences playing. There’s an expression in kink that I can’t quite put my finger on, but I do know this. I stopped crying so much. I felt the ache of the loss less and less. I’ve met people that have completely changed my life. I’ve smiled more than I ever did, felt more support and community than I’ve ever experienced. And that’s outside of Fet too!
My kink journey has led me to a Dom that has taught me things about myself and life that I didn’t know were possible. I have a leather family that is legacy and I am so proud to be the next generation.
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